Wherever the Road Leads

Lovin’ You’s Like Fryin’ Bacon Nekkid

I went to see Les Miserables recently. I am glad that I went to see it; it was a new experience for me. Other than being written by Victor Hugo, that was all I knew about Les Miserables.

Seeing the film in downtown Atlanta, I might have been shoulder-to-shoulder in a packed audience with limp-wristed latte drinkers, but I figured that the CinePlex Theater in suburban Bethlehem, out here in East Moses, would be a good place to see Les Miserables. The tattoo-ed, toothless Wal-Mart crowd with the Skoal-ring-jeaned husbands would all be at the theater featuring flatulence jokes and blow stuff up, not classic literature.

I had briefly corresponded with a friend about Les Miserables, who mentioned that the music was incredible. Okay, so I figured it would be along the lines of “Oklahoma”, where there is some action and dialog, then members of the cast would break into song.

Wrong-oh. Big time wrong-oh. There IS no dialog in the movie; the entire story is in song. One-hundred and fifty-seven minutes of various characters singing.

Now, whoever wrote the song and lyric is absolutely brilliant. Hugh Jackman and Russell Crowe are great actors whose performances in many movies I have enjoyed. They can both sing well. I’ll bet their cats don’t go tearing under the bed when they break out in song in the shower.

However, I think without realizing its entire impact, the South has rubbed off on me. Again, I am very glad that I saw the movie but I sure won’t be anxiously awaiting the release of the DVD.

Roger Alan Wade, appropriately enough from Chattanooga Tennessee, has penned some terrific redneck songs, including this post’s title, “Lovin’ You’s Like Fryin Bacon Nekkid”.

He has also written other true-life songs like “All Likkered Up”…

She come home late last night
Had her lipstick smeared,
Red dress tore,
High heels in her hand,
Paycheck blown,
Doin’ the hoochie-coochie
With lovin’ on her mind…

She was all likkered up.”

Or “Butt Ugly Slut”…

I want a butt ugly slut with a bad drinkin’ problem and a jealous old man in jail…

Aching love songs like “Counterman”…

I’m a counterman at the Auto Zone store in Birmingham Alabama,
We got everything from A to Z, some miscellaneous and what have ya.
I got the parts to fix all the parts of cars to make ’em all blow smoke,
But I ain’t got the part for the part of my heart
That woman of mine done broke.

Though his is the first version that I remember hearing, I was surprised to learn that this is a classic Shel Silverstein (Sylvia’s Mother, Cover of Rollin’ Stone) song. Here’s the lyrics, click the link and sing along…

Put another log on the fire.
Cook me up some bacon and some beans.
And go out to the car and change the tire.
Wash my socks and sew my old blue jeans.
Come on, baby, you can fill my pipe,
And then go fetch my slippers.
And boil me up another pot of tea.
Then put another log on the fire, babe,
And come and tell me why you’re leaving me.

Now don’t I let you wash the car on Sunday?
Don’t I warn you when you’re gettin fat?
Ain’t I a-gonna take you fishin’ with me someday?
Well, a man can’t love a woman more than that.
Ain’t I always nice to your kid sister?
Don’t I take her driving every night?
So, sit here at my feet ‘cos I like you when you’re sweet,
And you know it ain’t feminine to fight.

So, put another log on the fire.
Cook me up some bacon and some beans.
Go out to the car and lift it up and change the tire.
Wash my socks and sew my old blue jeans.
Come on, baby, you can fill my pipe,
And then go fetch my slippers.
And boil me up another pot of tea.
Then put another log on the fire, babe,
And come and tell me why you’re leaving me.

These Roger Alan Wade songs have been on the music stick in my pick up and I’ve been singing along for quite some time now. I’m kinda doubtin’ I’ll be singing along with Hugh and Russell anytime soon.

And I’m thinkin’ maybe I should get me another tattoo.

 

 

 

 

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