I’ve never liked ‘slapstick’. Never liked The Three Stooges. Never liked Soupy Sales’ pie-in-the-face. Humor, to me, is wit. What wit does it take to poke someone in the eye, get a pie in the face or be mocked and looked down on? Those, to me are the lowest form of humor, a title usually reserved for puns.
I like puns. Thinking is required to invent a pun and to understand one. “She was only the innkeeper’s daughter but all the horseman knew her.” Say it quickly and out loud, it’s one of my long-time favorites.
She was only the bootlegger’s daughter, but he loved her still.
She was only the cab driver’s daughter but all the boys wanted to meter.
Little Johnny’s teacher: “Johnny, please use fascinate, in a sentence.” Little Johnny replied, “I have a jacket with nine buttons, but I can only fasten eight.”
Okay, now down to the serious groaners….
In case you didn’t get them all, here’s some hints…
“YOLO” = You Only Live Once”, and Han Solo was portrayed by Harrison Ford all those eons ago.
On his computer, this individual is saving the file, ‘private ryan’. Thus, “Saving Private Ryan.”
A group of crows is referred to as a “murder”. Two crows falls short of a group.
Any small line attached to the end of a stroke in a letter is called a “serif”. Serifs make a letter look fancier but do not always make it more readable. This particular typeface is “sans-serif”, nothing fancy but easy to read.
The goose’s brood – goslings – have had the face of the actor, Ryan Gosling, photoshopped onto their own faces.
Hilarious? Maybe not, but at least some thought was put into them.
It was the much-anticipated premiere of the Bolshoi Ballet in Moscow. The curtain was late in rising. After some delay, the Master of Ceremonies came through the curtain to break the news to the audience that they couldn’t get the stage lights to work but not to worry, with the advanced state of Russian Technology, the lights would be working very shortly.
Much time elapsed before the MC once more came through the curtain to announce that even with advanced Russian technology, they were having difficulty getting the stage lights to work.
At that, a Chinese fellow from the front row raised his hands and said he could get things rectified very quickly. Doubtful, but with nothing to lose, the Master of Ceremonies invited the Chinese fellow to come forward.
The Chinese fellow came on stage. He asked of the audience, “Would everyone on the right hand side of the theater please raise your right hand?” They did.
“Would everyone on the left hand side of the theater please raise your left hand?”
They did and immediately the stage lights came on, blazing in their full brilliance.
“That’s amazing!”, said the Russian Master of Ceremonies. “How could you, a visitor from China, get the lights to come on when the greatest Russian Technology could not?”
The Chinese fellow replied, “It is an ancient Chinese proverb that says “Many hands make light work.”
Don’t suffer alone… tell that one to someone else.Share